Question was asked by Kunal from California, US about ‘How to handle the feeling of being cheated by someone.
Pranam Sister Shivani,
My name is Kunal Pariani and I am reaching out to you today as I am in dire need of help with an extremely difficult situation that i have been put in. I have immense respect for you and salute you for the tireless work you have been doing guiding people to lead a spiritual and a better life. I hope that you would take just 5 minutes to read about my problem as I feel that you would be able to help me in someway here
In 2010, a school friend of mine asked me to cosign a private student loan for his friend, Pankaj Dhingra who was looking to pursue his Doctor of Dental Surgery (DDS) degree from New York University. Being still new to the US and in my early 20s, I did not realize the consequence of what it meant to cosign a loan and agreed to it. I thought I was doing an act of kindness and helping out another human being so that like me, he could also get a better education but unfortunately this has turned against me now.
The private student loan that i cosigned was for a total amount of $252,000 (approx 1.73CR INR) with a loan term of 25 years. Pankaj started repaying the loan from 2013 by making bare minimum payments and even with 4+ years of minimum payments, the loan amount has increased instead of decreasing. He stopped making payments in Feb 2018 and the bank informed me about the missed payments and asked me to make the payments on his behalf since I am the cosigner. After several attempts of reaching out to Pankaj, I found out that he has fled the country and has been living and working in New Delhi, India since Nov, 2017.
I was not aware of the missed payments and was shocked to hear that Pankaj had left the country without any notice since he did not communicate anything to me. I also found out that he has a charge of disorderly conduct against him for which he was arrested in Sep 2017 in Connecticut, USA that I found online here. I doubt he has any intentions of coming back to the US now and might not even be able to due to the criminal charges and debts on him in US. I want to share my story with you and where i am coming from. I was born and raised in India and lost both my parents by the age of 12 and was adopted by my maternal uncle who was living in the US and applied for my US citizenship. I did my entire schooling in India and completed my Bachelors in Engineering from VJTI, Mumbai in 2007. I moved to the US to pursue my Masters degree with the dream of building my life up from scratch. I have had to work very hard for everything that i achieved in my life including funding my own education and establishing a career and i feel that it is now all under jeopardy. My wife (Preshtha Bijlani) and I are in our early 30s and living near San Francisco, California, USA in a one bedroom rental flat trying to save every penny to secure our future and be able to buy a home one day.
I am in desperate need of help as I can’t take any legal action against him in India or US since i am legally responsible as a cosigner. Pankaj has committed a fraud by escaping the student loan in the US and burdening me with this huge loan amount of 1.8 CR. I cannot rely on him coming back to the US and repaying this loan and be on the hook for the next 20 years hoping he will make all his payments. Till then, i will not be able to afford buying a home as i will have to save enough money to repay his student loan first. I am crying for help as I need a miracle to get me out of this loan situation and i strongly feel that you could help me in someway possible.
Please help me get justice as i feel cheated and betrayed for a noble intention of helping someone from my motherland to get an education. I never thought that this would come back and steal everything i have worked so hard for. I am hoping to hear back from you. Thank you
To: Kunal and everyone reading
Your letter is received and read. Your situation is not difficult as much as you are thinking. You have to first find your friend from New Delhi and tell him what happened. if he understand, then will pay you the money, so that you can pay to the bank as a cosigner. Because you have contacted Sister Shivani, so you would have her many talks and Awakening episodes.
Your heart is good. You have helped someone with a good intention. Isn’t it. There is something that you need to know brother.” The one who does good my friend, is never ever overcome by any misfortune.’ – this is the TRUTH. Even if you feel cheated, then also consider this as good. Something better will happen. You also understand that money is not everything. If not money, you have got the hand of God. What is of more value? God is for the poor. You have done the right and hence you will never sleep with empty stomach. If you think yourself misfortunate because you live in a one bedroom flat, then you are thinking wrong. Those who are simple in the nature are nearer to God. Human beings prays for peace in life.
A very rich person also may not have a peace of mind. But you, who have done good in life, will have that. You you are rich. Peace cannot be bought. Inner happiness cannot be bought. If you had more than enough money, than you might indulge in any bad habits. Instead you are now saved from all that. You are instead very lucky. More sin are done by rich people. Isn’t it? You have everything to live happy. Even the one with billions of money does not have a peaceful sleep. We are on a journey. Our past actions (karma) ill influence our present and the future. Karma is of 3 categories – THOUGHTS – WORDS and ACTIONS. So god explained us – Think good for all, speak very sweet and less – Do beneficial service for all. You will get whatever you have given. Also do not blame anyone for anything. Just be happy. . As explained, you are instead lucky. Baba wants to see smile on your face. Just wait and watch – whatever will happen, is for your good. Have faith. You also know that a good karma has a great result.
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